Comments on: You Asked for It: Discipline, Nature Journals, and Books

By: Kimberly @ Raising Olives

Kimberly @ Raising Olives — Fri, 03 Jun 2011 11:51:30 +0000

Hi Mercy,

We begin folding hands in lap early (probably around 2-3 months). We start with having them fold their hands anytime anyone prays, (It’s amazing to watch a 6 month old fold their hands and bow their head with no prompting whenever anyone says, “Let’s pray….”) then whenever they are awake more during the worship service or family worship they fold their hands during the sermon or daddy’s teaching.

We simply hold their little hands together with our hands while they are sitting on our lap and they learn to keep their hands folded with almost no effort.

Each child is different and each parent is different, but this has worked for us.

By: Mercy

Mercy — Mon, 30 May 2011 19:22:28 +0000

Kimberly, I had a quick question for you regarding “folding hands in lap” while in worship. Our nearly-two-year old is doing very well in 1 1/2 hours services at church, in fact, she is doing almost as well as our nearly-five-year old. Neither one is required to fold their hands during church, but I am definitely interested in starting this. (I’ma amazed at how much better they behave and less discipline happens when they DON’T have distractions like toys!) What age do you normally introduce this, and how long of a time period are they expected to do it? I am thinking the five year old is definitely ready, but not sure about the 2 year old yet..?

By: Brittany

Brittany — Thu, 17 Mar 2011 01:54:55 +0000

Teach Them Diligently by Lou Priolo is the best book I have read on biblical discipline and what it means -specifically- to use God’s word to train, rebuke…etc.

By: Cardamom's Pod

Cardamom's Pod — Sat, 02 May 2009 10:25:23 +0000

I can’t find my copy of Shepherding a Child’s Heart – results of construction! Arg! I just remember reading it when my oldest were 2 and 1, and I was pregnant. Days were frustrating, and when I read what I should be doing, I sat on the floor and cried! I second the recommendation of Trumbull’s book, and I also like Reb Bradley’s book, “Tips on Child Training.” We don’t use a stroller much anymore, but when we did, we would tell the youngest two walkers to “take your spots” and they would hold on to the sides of the stroller. Obedience drills – a lot of fun and really help with attention and rapid obedience (especially when a former Navy daddy snaps out different orders to everyone in the space of 20 seconds!) Plus, the children love them.
Have a GREAT day!

By: Jamie

Jamie — Fri, 01 May 2009 18:55:01 +0000

We love Shepherding a Child’s Heart! We got that book as a gift when our oldest was born. We are very thankful for it.
We also do the “one hand on the cart” when we shop. Each of the kids have their spot, which is always the same. If we are somewhere where there is no cart (like the Farmer’s Market), they walk in a line, sort of Von Trapp style. We practice this at home, and even our 20 month old is catching on (we practice with him, too, as he’s about to be ousted from the youngest child position!). In the line, again, there is a specific order to it… every child has their spot. Otherwise I go crazy trying to keep head counts. When everyone’s in the same order every time, it just makes it easier on me (and eliminates arguments about who goes where). I have to say, while I want to cherish the time with all my little ones, I am looking forward to being able to do the buddy system!!! All in good time. Oh, and Kimberly, tell Suzanne she’s way too funny! I would have been so confused, and frankly, yes, it would have been very funny. Good times, good times.

By: Kimberly

Kimberly — Fri, 01 May 2009 18:51:36 +0000

Kristin,
I think you’re right about loving our children. Parents who love their children by obeying God’s Word will have an positive impact on their lives, not because we are so amazingly loving, but because God blesses obedience. Ultimately well behaved children are God’s blessing upon covenant faithfulness.

In our society well behaved children are an excellent opportunity to point people to God. We also get many compliments about our children and always attempt to point people to God and His Word. Occasionally we will be out in public and no one will say anything about the children’s behavior, then we’ll ask the children, “what is wrong with you today?”

Roan,
I think that I post too often. I just have a lot to say. I’ve been primarily talking to children for the past 13 years, so this is a nice outlet. Thanks for the heads up about the Thrumbill book. I think that I need to read his chapter on scolding, not good in that area.

Everyone,
Thanks for taking the time to comment. It’s nice to know that someone is reading and to get a little bit of adult conversation.

By: Kelli

Kelli — Fri, 01 May 2009 16:49:43 +0000

Great to hear this again-it reminds me what I’m supposed to be doing.

By: Roan

Roan — Fri, 01 May 2009 14:24:20 +0000

I am catching up with you! I just laughed and laughed at your Not Me Monday!—viola! and your friend offering to buy you some shampoo!
In addition to Shepherding a Child’s Heart, I have enjoyed Hints on Child Training by Clay Thrumbill (sp?). His chapter about never scolding has stuck with me the most. I really strive not to scold. Also, you are right about clearly communicating your expectations of behaviour before you even get out of the car. We also practice situations before we leave…..we have even practiced standing in line (to be used in the post office, bank, etc.). We practice sitting quietly, we practice getting in and out of the van….you get the idea.
Have a super day!

By: Kristin

Kristin — Fri, 01 May 2009 13:39:04 +0000

We also use the “buddy system” with our children. When our older girls heard about the Duggar family using it, they begged us to let them do it. It works very well for our family. We also spend all of our days with our children. We get many comments on their good behavior when we are out. My husband and I have often wondered at just what it is that makes them so well-behaved. We used to tell people that it was because we homeschool or because they don’t watch television. Now I realize that it is simply because we love them. That alone can have such a major impact on their lives.