Nicholas (1) does not LOVE to wear necklaces. He does not crawl around the house trolling for necklaces to put on and he does not clap and wave when he finds one in an attempt to get everyone to look at him with his beautiful decoration. His older brothers do not quickly strip him of his trophy in order to maintain some manly dignity for the Olive boys. 
Of course the bigger boys do not scour the house looking for necklaces. They do not find them and put them away just to keep them out of the hands of their baby brother.
Colby (2) does not prefer the pink bib to the blue one, much to the chagrin of his older brothers. His older brothers have not taught him to call the pink bib “white”. They would not want to confuse him with his colors merely to avoid the shame of having their younger brother walk around the house asking for his pink bib.
My children did not capture a cricket and place him in the enclosed driver’s area of the electric train
The children did not proceed to show me their ant passenger, who being more astute than I and seeing where this game was leading, was evidently trying to commit suicide by leaping off the flat car on which he was riding. A few minutes later I did not hear one little miscreant shout, “smash him a little bit so that he won’t jump off the train.” WHAT?? We teach our children to be kind to critters, so they would not advocate partially smashing a helpless ant simply so they could continue their game.
When Colby (2) came into the kitchen while I was washing the dishes by hand (yep the dishwasher is still broken) and said that he was hungry, I did not pick up the leftover scrambled eggs, sit Colby on the floor and set the eggs, serving dish and spoon included on his lap and tell him to eat up. 
Y’all know I always have everything together, the laundry is always caught up, food is always fixed and we never struggle with clutter, so you know that this picture must have been staged. I did not give our 2 year old cold eggs and have him eat them with a serving spoon. What really happened was that I set him down with a lovely china plate purchased for pennies at a yard sale (of course) and gave him a healthy homemade granola bar. He was shoeless because he had taken his shoes off at the front door, not because he 1) was playing outside in the poison ivy without shoes 2) took his shoes off and threw them into the poison ivy for us to try to find several days from now when we are running around trying to get out of the house and not be late for some appointment or other.
We have not had company 9 out of the past 11 days. I am not exhausted, over committed, or overwhelmed. Mark is not working nearly 80 hours a week, only stopping for a couple hours each evening to eat dinner and lead family worship. I do not miss my oldest “baby” who is staying with her great-grandmother this week.
Now go read about laundry systems, menu planning or decluttering so that you can be just as amazing as I am and have to make up things to confess on Monday. 
Or you can read more confessions Not Me style or head on over to MckMama’s blog to read what others have not been doing this week.
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It is very obvious that Nick needs a more positive male influence to counter his older sisters, so next week he is coming to work with me.
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Raising Olives Reply:
June 15th, 2009 at 9:21 am
Seth, Only if you take Colby too. He LOVES to “paint”.
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Great Not Me’s! I hopped over from Ace’s blog. I love your blog! YOu have such a beautiful family! I hope you have a great Monday!
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Great Not Me’s! Too funny about the crickey train driver!! My boys have the same train…though they haven’t ever used insect to drive it before! I love the pick of your little guy eating eggs from that big bowl! Too cute!
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I love the “man laws” that your boys have! I recently put my youngest in girl’s diapers. My husband was horrifed – especially when my older son wanted to wear them too! Thank you for the smiles!
Kristin
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My youngest loves to accessorize also!! Too cute.. My house is NEVER cluttered or taken over with laundry either!! cute blog..love it!
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I love you NMM. I definitely chuckled. I have never sat my child down with leftovers in the bowl from several hours earlier so that she could eat. We wouldn’t do things like that.
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I love how you describe your boys! Sounds like they have a very defined set of guy rules with no pink or necklaces allowed!
The eggs pic is so cute! Reminds me of something I’d let mine do!
Happy not me monday!
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I found your blog via MckMama’s site. Loved the story about the automobeetle. God bless.
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When I saw A at church Sunday I did not secretly wonder how in the world you were going to manage. I did not wish I could be a fly on the wall and see you do her jobs and yours! I would not think these things because I am such a good long time friend. :>)
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Awesome and terrifying. My 15 month old is not yet into bugs…. I’m SO hoping he stays with sticks and balls instead of moving on to bugs.
Happy NM! monday
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Thanks for stopping by my blog! Come back anytime!
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MomStarr,
Amber is being joined today by Kaitlin, so not only will I be without my biggest helper, but I will spend the rest of the week without my TWO biggest helpers. You want to send one of your big kids down to help out??
You just keep on laughing because there will come a time…
Blessings,
Kimberly
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LOVED these NMMs! Happy Monday!
Cxx
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Very funny post. I believe that none of those things happen. I also didn’t take my shower at 2:30 this afternoon or get my 2 year old dressed just before nap time. That would never happen.
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Wow, Kimberly, enlightening and amusing as always! Titus is, as I type this, sleeping with his favorite pink ballerina bunny. Glad he’s not the only little man who’s into “pink” things! Too funny. The bug stories always make me laugh as well. I am not a bug person, and I cannot help but shudder at the thought of all the “pets” I may end up with as time goes on.
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GREAT post! You had me laughing out loud, slightly squishing suicidal bugs, missing shoes found in poison ivy, washing dishes for 11!!! by hand! Way to go, you are Wonder Woman!
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That was a great post
I love your page!
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Crickets are great engineers I hear. Fun Not Me’s!
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Raising Olives Reply:
June 17th, 2009 at 12:11 am
Comments on Not Me Monday’s are always my favorite, you all have me laughing out loud. Boys sleeping with pink ballerina bunnies, getting children dressed just in time for nap and alliteration like this, “slightly squishing suicidal bugs”. A blogger couldn’t ask for better comments, keep them coming!
Blessings,
Kimberly
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