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Not Me Monday: Peppercorns, Cappuccino and Cussing

When bringing dessert out to the table, I did not see a handful of rice fly through the air (literally) and land on the dining room floor.  Upon further investigation I did not find out that the spill was not accidental.  One of our children did not lob their last few spoonfuls of rice onto the floor, so that she wouldn’t have to eat it before having her dessert.   Nope, not in our house.

I did not walk into the kitchen to find a large percentage of the children frantically sweeping up peppercorns and putting them back into the pepper cellar.  Nope if you come over for dinner you need not wonder if your pepper was rolling around on the ground, stepped on by little feet and swept into the dustpan before it finally came to rest on your Fettuccine Alfredo.

spilled pepperI did not purchase a whole  package of chocolate covered cappuccino beans knowing that I am the only one in the house who likes them and if I had they would not be more than half way gone.

On July 4th we did not put a large tarp out on the hill in the back yard, soap up the children and send them sliding down.  Nope not us.  If we wanted a slip ‘n’ slide, we would have bought one at the store and would not have made do with a tarp and dish soap.

My husband did not send the two emails pasted below.  Pay attention, it’s a little hard to follow at first, but worth your time.  This is the text of the second email that my husband, Mark, did not send to one of his vendors, Kevin.

Kevin,
(Someone) just informed me of my wonderful greeting to you in my first email. I apologize and meant to say “Hello” and hope I did not cause you to think I am impatient, upset, etc. Thanks for your help with this and I will try not to cuss you out anymore.

Have a great weekend!

Confused?  The text of the first email that Mark did not send to Kevin may clear things up for you..

Hell Kevin!

Will you give us a lead time on this package?  Have a great 4th!

OOOOOPS!

Raising Olives has a lot more Not Me Monday’s.  The one that the kids still ask me to read often is Dames, Trains and Automobeetles, it’s just like a story book in our house, except of course they know all the players.  You can also head over to MckMama’s for a lot more “Not Me” fun.

You may also enjoy:

  1. Not Me! Monday
  2. Not Me Monday
  3. Not Me Monday: I Did NOT…

13 Responses to Not Me Monday: Peppercorns, Cappuccino and Cussing
  1. Julie From Inmates
    July 6, 2009 | 10:26 am

    This is my first visit to Olives. I enjoyed your post. =)

    [Reply]

  2. JenT
    July 6, 2009 | 10:37 am

    roflol!!! The emails cracked me up! So funny. I’m guessing Kevin understood. :)

    [Reply]

  3. MomStarr
    July 6, 2009 | 11:21 am

    Doesn’t Knoxville have car rental places? Ahem!! I think you know what I mean.

    [Reply]

  4. shelly
    July 6, 2009 | 11:39 am

    Wow, what a big family! How do you manage all that crazy-ness? :)

    [Reply]

  5. Dawn
    July 6, 2009 | 1:47 pm

    I’m rofl too! Oh what a typo can do…

    [Reply]

  6. Hannah
    July 6, 2009 | 2:01 pm

    I am really enjoying finding all of the gems all over your site. Thanks for all you do. :)

    Blessings!

    Hannah

    Oh, and if you could find time to read my post from this morning, I could REALLY use some ideas.

    [Reply]

  7. Tina Fisher
    July 6, 2009 | 2:35 pm

    Hey, I’d eat the pepper on the Fettuccine Alfredo….it would be like eating at something at my own home!

    Great post!

    [Reply]

  8. hi-d
    July 6, 2009 | 4:12 pm

    Hilarious! Love the email mistake!

    [Reply]

  9. Paige
    July 6, 2009 | 10:45 pm

    THANK YOU !!! I needed that bellylaugh right this very moment. about the email. :) Gotta love a great typo.

    a

    [Reply]

  10. Nicki
    July 6, 2009 | 10:55 pm

    Don’t worry about the soapy water and tarp. We’ve done that very thing! And now that we own a slip-n-slide, I can say the soapy tarp is much better!

    LOVED the emails! My husband and I both laughed out loud!

    [Reply]

  11. Anita
    July 8, 2009 | 12:09 am

    Hey, I found your blog through MckMama’s… what a great “not me” post! Funny about the letters. It’s so fun to browse through them and get a few chuckles of all the things we “dont do”.
    I also was going to ask for a bit of help. (this should take less than a minute) I entered my son in a Crazy Haired Baby photo shoot contest. He is in the top 9.. and it’s just down to who gets the most votes.
    If you could click on this link: http://lucylimestudios.com/2009/07/crazy-haired-kids-casting-call-shannon-stevenson-lucy-lime/
    Select baby #6
    Click Vote
    Thanks for your help! Have a great day!

    [Reply]

  12. Ladybug
    July 8, 2009 | 8:03 am

    This was great! Thanks for sharing! I love your blog!

    [Reply]

  13. Courtney
    July 8, 2009 | 8:36 am

    Ha! Too funny! Love that email-
    Blessings!

    [Reply]

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