Diana asked, ”(I)f women are to mentor to the younger women and women are to “be busy at home”, how do they find the balance between the two?”
Here are some of the ways that our family has found that we are able to encourage and serve younger or peer families:
- Cooking meals – This is an easy one. I (or one of my children) prepare food for 12 people 3 times a day. It’s super easy to add a little more and take it over to another family for dinner.
- Sending our children to help – While I’m not often able to leave the home to cook or clean for a younger woman struggling with a houseful, our children are quite capable of going over and cooking, cleaning or providing child-care. (This is an advantage of being in the middle years of parenting. We obviously couldn’t do this when our oldest was 5.)
- Being hospitable – Inviting families into your home for a meal is a wonderful opportunity for encouragement and edification all around.
- Be available in person. – A very easy way for me to be available to others is to have moms and their children over for a couple hours in the morning. We talk, the children play, we eat lunch and then everyone heads home for naps. We are able, and frequently do, take a day or half day off of “school” which is another advantage to homeschooling year round.
- Be available by phone – Make sure that you don’t let the phone run your life. That’s what an answering machine is for. Be sure to make your family your priority, but you can do a lot of good over the phone. I have some friends who call once every week or so, just to see how I’m doing and to catch up. It is so uplifting for me to nurture those friendships with fellowship over the phone, whereas I wouldn’t have the time to actually get together in person.
- Be available by email.
Probably the most important thing for moms with younger children to remember is, prioritize. God, your husband, children and home come first. Being available to help and encourage younger moms is something that comes as you begin to reap some of the benefits of your hard work, but it is a secondary calling.
Pray, look to your husband for guidance and listen to that guidance, then set some boundaries. For example, during the first trimester of my pregnancies, my husband has a rule, “No inviting company over for dinner” and “No making dinner to take to other families” unless I’m able to consistently have a hot dinner ready for my family each evening. I get very sick and very tired at the beginning of a pregnancy and it is a struggle for me to get dinner on the table for my own family, so for me to voluntarily take on extra responsibility during that time isn’t a good decision.
I know there are lots of other ways to minister to others. I’d love to hear your ideas.
Titus 2: Mentoring Younger Moms
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Your blog is a wonderful ministry to Christian homeschooling moms. I have struggled finding the time for mentoring. I have a women’s Bible study in my home on Tuesday nights and my husband is 100% in support of it. I always make coffee and try to have some snacky kind of food. It’s become a mom’s night out and we’re usually not alone until 10:30 or 11pm. It is a sacrifice, but so well worth it! It’s hard or impossible to really get to know someone in 2 hrs on Sunday and 2 hrs on Wednesday. It takes making efforts like this to really know and love one another. And of course, the cement that holds us together is our love for the Lord and committment to the study of His Word. I also send notes to women in our church regularly. I need to make more calls and do more face to face. Thanks for the reminder and encouragement!
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Raising Olives Reply:
November 12th, 2009 at 5:55 pm
Thanks Celee. You’ve been an encouragement to me.
Just remember, don’t overstretch yourself, you still have a houseful and you’re already doing a lot!
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Thank you for the encouragement this series has been to me. There are several ladies who are really hurting in our church right now, and this has been the challenge I’ve needed to reach out to them more. I salve my conscience by telling myself we’re too young to be Titus 2 women yet, but the truth is that there are younger women all around me that I can reach out to. Your thoughts about adding just a bit more food to what I’ve already planned is spot on–a very simple way to reach out to others!
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Raising Olives Reply:
November 12th, 2009 at 5:52 pm
Thank you Debbie.
If your ever this direction, please look us up.
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It is also easy to have a young mom over in the midst of your house cleaning, child training, meal cooking times. Seeing it action is a great way to mentor another mom. I have learned more by actually watching an older woman than by words alone!
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I am loving this series that you are doing. This is a topic near and dear to my heart. The other idea that I wanted to add was to send (through the old fashioned snail mail) a card. Most people get their mail sometime in the later part of the day and a bright cheery, thinking of you card can do wonders to lift a tired mother that has been “busy” all day. It might just be what puts a smile on her face and a bounce in her step as she begins dinner and prepares for her husband to return.
Again, thank you for taking the time to minister through this blog. As a homeschooling mother to four seven and under it is a huge blessing. We are still planning to add more to our family as God blesses in that area so I am trying now to learn as much as I can from other mothers of large families. God is using you. Thank you for being willing.
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Raising Olives Reply:
November 19th, 2009 at 6:17 pm
That is a wonderful idea. I love receiving “real” mail.
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I think your blog is another way of mentoring. I really appreciate hearing tips and tricks that work for you. I’m always blessed when I get to spend time with older women. Even just talking to them. I always end up soaking up some bit of wisdom.
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