Feel free to link up your 90 Day Challenge post here.
I would not write and publish a post that needs this warning.
Warning: If you do not have children and think that you would like to have some in the future you should stop reading right now. If you have children, but they have not had a serious stomach bug and you don’t want to know what is in store or if you have a weak stomach, you should not read this post.
While sitting in church, during the service, the Sunday morning before Christmas our 4 year old did not stand up and say to me, “Mom, I think I’m going to throw up.” Right before she did exactly that, all over my dress and the floor.
I do not have previous experience with children puking during a Sunday morning worship service. Just ask the families from our church back home about the time when I brought our 4 small children (3 years and younger) to church by myself, sat in the very front of the sanctuary in order to be near my mom (the pastor’s wife), and during a very quiet part of the service one of our children began to throw up and continued and continued and………, well you get the idea. I’m sure that none of our church family remembers that episode and certainly no one would bring it up in the comment section of this blog.
Nope, our children are not getting to be expert church pukers.
Christmas night around 1am, Nicholas (1) came into our bedroom saying, “It’s yucky.” It’s one of the few phrases that he says, so I didn’t think too much of it. Since I am the “get up with the kids during the night” parent in our home, I did not wake Mark and ask him to go look into what was going on using the excuse that I was still recovering from the stomach bug myself. (No excuses from me, nope.)
Mark is an experienced father of (soon to be) 10 children so one minute later I did not hear him say, “Honey, I think I’m going to need some help with this.” We did not discover that Colby (3) had thrown up in his bed and then, ….. well, I actually can’t type out what else happened to the poor child, even with my warning. So, Mark and I worked together to clean up bed, boy and bathroom. I did not laugh at the tremendous mess that had been made WHILE we were cleaning it up. I also did not laugh at Nicholas running around saying, “It’s yucky! It’s yucky!” I have no sense of humor in the middle of the night and do not enjoy my children even in very odd situations. 
About 30 minutes after we had gotten back into bed Nicholas came into our bedroom again saying, “It’s yucky.” This time I listened to him and went to check things out. Nothing. 30 minutes later we repeat the scene and again 30 minutes later.
By the time that Nicholas came in the fourth time saying, “It’s yucky.” I did not pat him on the head, give him a kiss and a squeeze and tell him to go get back into bed. A few minutes later I could tell that he’s still not sleeping so I drag myself out of bed and pick him up to return him to his bed. At this point I did not turn on the light only to discover that I had just told my sweet one year old to go get back into a bed that he has completely soiled by throwing up. No, I am not THAT mom.
And don’t say that I didn’t warn you!
Want to feel better about your illness management skills? Here is my Not Me: The Sick Edition. I completely understand if you don’t want to read anymore of my Not Me Mondays, but I’ve posted some good ideas about saving money and organizing your laundry and clothes in addition to lots of homeschooling posts.
You may also enjoy:
Hi, I'm Kimberly. 
This brings back horrible memories of Christmas 2008. We did NOT throw up at church, but my husband got sick at his parents house. I brought the rest of the family home and his father brought him home later. The bug passed from person to person with rapid succession. I slept that night on towels in the floor of my bedroom with my 2 year old. Not fun. I’m glad you’re all better now.
[Reply]
Oh I feel for you, I really do! About half of us got sick from a bad ham a couple of weeks ago. I spent most of the night cleaning puke and then proceeded to get sick the next morning. It started with the youngest and went up (the oldest four didn’t get sick). My mom said it was probably just part of the ham that was bad and that is why only some of us were sick. One of the things I hate about the children getting sick is that I am the only one that can clean it up. My husband has a really weak stomach.
Thankfully, we’ve only had one public episode. Our two-year-old threw up in Sam’s about a year ago. So far we have a pretty good track record, I guess. Hopefully it will stay that way!
[Reply]
Kimberly @ Raising Olives Reply:
January 5th, 2010 at 7:36 pm
Our only public throw-up episodes have been the ones at church. Maybe because we don’t get out much.
I’m so sorry about your husband having a weak stomach. That has got to be tough!
[Reply]
Oh no!! I’m so sorry that happened but, love that you have a sense of humor about it. Blessings on your week.
[Reply]
Kimberly @ Raising Olives Reply:
January 5th, 2010 at 7:37 pm
I’ve grown into the sense of humor part.
Thank you.
[Reply]
Kimberly,
I am so sorry…sick children are not fun to deal with in the middle of the night like that…poor little babies…fortunately for me, I sleep as hard as a rock, so I often do not hear it, so my blessed husband does it.
C~
[Reply]
Kimberly @ Raising Olives Reply:
January 5th, 2010 at 7:38 pm
We are the opposite, unless I wake him, Mark will sleep through it. It’s good for having newborns, he still gets all his sleep.
[Reply]
I have never done that either. We have yet to puke in church but now that I say that we certainly will. LOL
[Reply]
Oh, your poor little guy!
[Reply]
Oh no! I have had those kinds of nights… I mean. No! I certainly have NOT had days and nights like that. And I have never once thought of laughing while cleaning up a mess. Not me!
[Reply]
Kimberly @ Raising Olives Reply:
January 5th, 2010 at 7:42 pm
Laughing while cleaning is the best preventative medicine.
[Reply]
Gross but hilarious. Hope the bug is clearing out of the house!
[Reply]
Kimberly @ Raising Olives Reply:
January 5th, 2010 at 7:43 pm
Yes, everyone is feeling much better, thank you.
[Reply]
Oh, my… that’s about all I have to say… you poor woman! lol… I have had a kid throw up on me in church… and it wasn’t even my own!! My husband also got puked on, but he got some on his face and in his mouth (he would totally kill me for sharing this…lol)
[Reply]
Kimberly @ Raising Olives Reply:
January 5th, 2010 at 7:44 pm
A kid who is not yours puking on you certainly takes the cake. Somehow when it’s your own kid’s….. it’s just not as bad.
LOL about your husband.
[Reply]
Oh man! I can relate with the throwing up in church. We were visiting a super conservative church about 30mins away from home, and sitting up at the very front in our Sunday best, when my three year old started puking. She was looking at me like “What is happening?” and “What do I do?” I panicked trying to catch it in my hands (YUCK), and then finally scooped her up with her face in my chest and quickly walked to the bathroom. As soon as I got to the bathroom she stopped vomiting of course. I cleaned us both up the best that I could. In retro spect, why didn’t I just let her finish? It was already on the floor. My husband sat waiting nicely with our newborn baby, before I called him on his cell and said “ummm… hello, are you coming?” to which he replied, “oh, do we need to leave?” umm ya think? “yes please,” i said. so we started our trek home but not before stopping at a gas station for some plastic bags, which were needed!
So sorry you guys have been sick! I hope you all get well soon!
[Reply]
Kimberly @ Raising Olives Reply:
January 5th, 2010 at 7:46 pm
Ha ha ha ha, puking kids in a church where you are just visiting. I completely get panicking. I did that when I was alone with the 4 little ones. My mom had to lean over and say, “Kimberly, get him out of here.” I didn’t want to stand up and spill everything that was in my dress on the floor. *sigh* The things parents put up with.
[Reply]
Nope, you are not that mom. LOL. You still make me laugh so hard I want to pee in my pants…. Then again I only laugh cause I can sympathsize…. not from throw up but peepee accidents when my oldest was potty training….. Poor girl….
[Reply]
Kimberly @ Raising Olives Reply:
January 5th, 2010 at 7:49 pm
Oh don’t get me started on pee!!!!
[Reply]
at least you have a sense of humor about it! Not sure I could handle it!
[Reply]
I am laughing hard…but only because I have been there. My 11 yr old used to puke all the time! when we gave him any kind of medicine. He was very excited to call me from our new church…to tell me that he puked during the very first Mass for the school kids!
[Reply]
oh my!!
[Reply]
I feel for you my friend. Over the Christmas break we went through the same ordeal. Our little one (1 yo) had something coming out of both ends for 6 straight days. I was about to lose my mind…on top of being sick myself. Hope your household is doing much better. Hopefully all is well with us too!!
[Reply]
Kimberly @ Raising Olives Reply:
January 5th, 2010 at 7:50 pm
6 DAYS STRAIGHT? Are you sure you didn’t lose your mind?
We’re all feeling great! (well aside from continued morning sickness, but that’s for a great cause)
[Reply]
Okay, I guess I’ll go ahead and tell you our funniest family “mess”. When my… okay I will not reveal the identity in order to protect the innocent, CHILD was 2, he kept getting out of bed when he wasn’t supposed to, so we told him in no uncertain terms that he was NOT to get out again!
A little while later he kept calling and calling for me, and when I went in to see what he needed… Oh my!
His 2 year old explanation? “Some kinda honimal (animal) in my bottom go, ‘RAWR’ and poo-poo all over my bed! And me so angwy!”
Well, I did tell him not to get up again…
[Reply]
Kimberly @ Raising Olives Reply:
January 5th, 2010 at 7:51 pm
You make me laugh as always. Oh my the things kids say!!!!
[Reply]
Kimberly @ Raising Olives Reply:
January 7th, 2010 at 5:25 pm
Test!
[Reply]
So do I get the bad friend award for bringing up the previous experience? What I realy want to know is did the pastor continue preaching not missing a beat like your dad did?!? Your child getting sick didn’t make as much of an impression as your dad continuing to preach as if nothing had happened while elders/deacons immediately jumped up and began cleaning things up. And just so you know, one of mine threw up at church too. Thankfully they got out of the sanctuary but not into the bathroom. I was home with another child, so Brian and a couple of deacons got to clean it all up. It is now one of Brian’s greatest fears that a child will get sick at church. BTW, I’ve really been missing you lately!
[Reply]
Kimberly @ Raising Olives Reply:
January 5th, 2010 at 7:53 pm
No, you get the good friend award because you gave me something to post about!
This time it was a lot less obvious, but yes, the service didn’t miss a beat and Mark and I are getting to be better at handling situations like this. Sadly.
I miss you too! We’re hoping to visit up there again when I start to feel better.
[Reply]
What I want to know is where are the pictures!!! Surely you thought to get the camera while cleaning all the messes!
[Reply]
Kimberly @ Raising Olives Reply:
January 5th, 2010 at 7:54 pm
That omission was a conscience decision.
Oven fire = pretty cool. Vomit = not.
[Reply]
Okay, here’s a good one…When our kid’s rooms were arranged differently, both girls shared a room with bunk beds, and these bunk beds have a full size bed on bottom with a twin on top. One morning when I went in to wake them up, I noticed the girl on bottom had thrown up (apparently in her sleep and never realized it; they’ve done that a LOT). Then I noticed that there was vomit on the vertical rail between the two mattresses. My eye traveled up to see vomit on the upper bunk platform, and then the top bunk girl’s pillow, and then I realized that it was actually the girl on TOP that had thrown up, and some of it had fallen down and landed ON her sister’s FACE! Yuk! Being the diplomatic mom that I am, I didn’t ever tell the girl on bottom what had happened, even after she woke up thinking that SHE was the one who had thrown up. I’ll keep that dirty little secret with me (and you guys) forEVER!
[Reply]
Loni Reply:
January 4th, 2010 at 8:42 pm
HILLARIOUS
[Reply]
Kimberly @ Raising Olives Reply:
January 5th, 2010 at 7:57 pm
I had to share your story with Mark. So classic.
Did you see that someone else also left a comment about the top twin puking on the bottom double?
[Reply]
Oh, I so feel for you. We have only had one puke in Walmart, once, but that was bad enough! And we had a “Night of the Noodles” where my hubby and I both couldn’t help laughing as we were picking noodles out of bedding, carpet, etc. When I told my friend about our noodle night, she told me this story. Once she was sick with the stomach bug so much so that she was laying on the floor in the bathroom. One of her kids came in and threw up on her! Can you even imagine! Hope everyone is feeling much better!
[Reply]
Kimberly @ Raising Olives Reply:
January 5th, 2010 at 7:57 pm
“Night of Noodles” ha ha ha ha. I need to post about puke more often, you all have GREAT stories.
[Reply]
Unfortunately I can NOT relate to this. Nothing like this has ever happened to me.
It actually reminds me of an incident in my house http://oneilies.blogspot.com/2008/10/bad-day.html which then was followed by:
http://oneilies.blogspot.com/2008/10/another-bad-day.html
If you dare you can look it up.
[Reply]
Oh, I can't believe nobody has commented on this yet. Your midnight puking story is so familiar! My boys slept in a bunk bed, the kind with a double on the bottom and a twin on top. Top bunk threw up on bottom bunk, Bottom bunk boy was a very heavy sleeper and woke up after I was trying to help top bunk boy out of bed…"Hey! Who poured water on my head?" We still laugh about it to this day and they are 15 years older than they were then. Some times the older (top bunk) will get a look in his eye and smile at his younger bro. and whine "Hey! Who poured water on my head?" I admit it was even funny at the time, even though my poor little son was sick.
[Reply]
Kimberly @ Raising Olives Reply:
January 5th, 2010 at 8:01 pm
I’ve got to say that sleeping in the bottom bunk has got to be a serious drag, when your sibling has a stomach bug. I can’t imagine.
[Reply]
oh poor baby!!! but it happens to all of us!!
[Reply]
…and then there was the time we ran out of clean sheets to change the beds and cribs with in one night that we put them in sleeping bags on our bedroom floor next to the bathroom only to have them sit up simultaneously and turn and puke on each other…again
[Reply]
Kimberly @ Raising Olives Reply:
January 5th, 2010 at 8:17 pm
Bwahahaha! I love it.
[Reply]
Your poor family! I can’t imagine being that sick on Christmas
Puking is NOT my thing and so I married an RN so I wouldn’t have to deal with puking. Well, my wonderful husband works three days a week and has managed to miss EVERY SINGLE puking episode in our home! I feel entitled to a refund of sorts 
[Reply]
Kimberly @ Raising Olives Reply:
January 7th, 2010 at 6:06 am
This is too funny and yes, some type of refund may be in order.
[Reply]
ok, so we had a stomach bug here at home just yesterday. Monday night my 7y.o. wakes up and pukes dinner (beans and collard greens) all over her bed. Then she proceeds to puke every 30 minutes all night long. After the first couple throw ups there was nothing left in her stomach but bile. Nobody slept. Tuesday morning my 4y.o. has breakfast. 15 minutes later pukes his grape juice and everything else all over my living room carpet.
so to summarize, I had a joyful day yesterday pregnant with a 33 week belly chasing children with a bucket and cleaning puked stained carpet.
Praise the Lord, they are all better today and nobody is feeling sick anymore and everyone is back to eating and playing normally.
life with children!! PS I never had a public episode of throwing up.
[Reply]
Kimberly @ Raising Olives Reply:
January 7th, 2010 at 6:09 am
Stomach bugs and late pregnancy should be outlawed.
I’m so glad that you are feeling better!
Public puking? Just wait, you have plenty of time.
[Reply]
We had the stomach bug just last week. Three of my children got it at the same time and so I had them all lay on blankets and old towels in the living room (towels covered their pillows), each had a bowl, and I slept on the couch while rotating to help each one as their “turn” came to throw up. Needless to say, I didn’t sleep much that night, but I was blessed to be Mama.
[Reply]
ROFL! Gotta love public throwing up. I have been thrown up on more times it public by my little one more times than I can count. One time in a beautiful seafood rest on the beach, 30 minutes from our hotel and I had nothing to change into. It was disgusting!
[Reply]
Kimberly @ Raising Olives Reply:
January 7th, 2010 at 6:11 am
Interestingly, all our public puking episodes have been at church. Oh, I take that back. One kids threw up just before we could get to the bathroom at a Ryan’s. It wasn’t a bug, just too much food. (I don’t know that we’ve ever been to Ryan’s since then…)
A nice seafood restaurant? The idea of that just makes me laugh.
[Reply]