This post is about dreams, pregnancy dreams. I typically have two types of dreams when I’m pregnant. The phenomenon fascinates me. I either have horrible, nightmare-ish type dreams where I wake crying or in a panic or I have lovely dreams about a peaceful birth and that dream-like time with a newborn.
When I was pregnant with our first baby the bad dreams focused on Mark leaving me. There were various situations and various ways that it played out, but the theme was always the same. (Just for the record, these dreams were completely unfounded, after all, 13 years later he is still here.)
As soon as we had children the dreams changed. Now I dream about our children dying. Again the dreams are quite diverse. They take place in different settings, with different people, different activities and a different child being taken but they all have the same theme. One of our children drowns, falls off a cliff, gets hit by a car, etc. and I wake crying. I always wake at the point when I know that my child will not survive, my mind does not venture beyond it.
It’s interesting to me that my horrible pregnancy dreams all focus on losing those closest to me, first Mark and now our children. It is also interesting that last my last two pregnancies I have not have a single one of these frightening dreams (at least not yet). Part of me would like to say that it is because I’m becoming more trusting and less fearful, but I think that it probably has more to do with the fact that I’m just too exhausted. Please don’t tell me it’s because I’m getting old. 😉
Then there are the other types of dreams, those lovely, peaceful dreams of an ideal birth and a precious newborn. These generally don’t start until my last trimester and last night I had my first one. The baby came so quickly, there was no pain or even discomfort, no fear of Erb’s Palsy. It wasn’t until after I was holding our beautiful little girl that I even thought about any of that. In my dream I remember thinking, “There were no complications, no c-section, I feel wonderful and the baby is perfect.”
So now with the first birth dream of this pregnancy under my belt, I’m beginning to realize that it won’t be much longer (10 weeks) before we are holding another baby girl. I am looking forward to that.
What about you do you have pregnancy dreams?