**My husband says that posting this post on a “Not Me Monday” is like opening up the paper to the comic section and finding the obituaries. So I apologize to those who were visiting for a chuckle.**
Last week when I posted my updated ‘To-do’ list of things to accomplish before the baby arrives. I was surprised and blessed by so many of you who took the time to comment or email and let me know that you are praying for me, for this baby, this birth and our family. Thank you! That outpouring of prayer support prompted me to write this post, because I know you’ll pray…
Our birth history is unusual. As a matter of fact, I’ve never heard of anyone who has experienced anything similar to us and I’ve asked. A lot.
Until after the birth of our last baby, we were told by every health care professional we spoke with that the complications that we experienced with our births were unrelated to each other. Each time we explained our history we were told we were not at risk for more trouble, that our history was simply a string of unexpected, unforeseeable complications.
It wasn’t until after our last child was fairly severely injured at birth and needed to be seen by specialists at Shriner’s Orthopedic in Philadelphia that Dr. K sat down with us and explained that while he didn’t know WHY these things were happening, he did strongly believe that all of these complications were related and that we had a very high risk of another Brachial Plexus Palsy or worse happening again.
I was hoping to get through more birth stories before I posted this, but since I’m a little extremely slow allow me to summarize for you the way that Dr. K did for us.
Out of 9 births:
- We’ve experienced 6 shoulder dystocias. (Until Dr. K pointed it out, we did not realize that we should count those babies who suffered from broken collar bones as a dystocia. Dr. K said, “If there wasn’t a problem with their shoulders being stuck, their bones wouldn’t break.” Um, yes, that makes sense. Why did no one tell us sooner??)
- 4 babies have suffered a broken collar bone or humerous during birth due to SD (shoulder Dystocia).
- 3 babies, because of SD, have suffered from a lack of oxygen to the point that the doctor/midwife was concerned about possible brain damage..
- 1 of our children suffered Brachial Plexus Palsy (Erb’s Palsy – paralysis of his arm) because of SD.
There are risks factors for shoulder dystocia, but we don’t fit into those risks. We’ve experienced problems with small and large babies, difficulties when I was carrying no extra weight, we tried chiropractic care, stayed active during birth, avoided unnecessary interventions and had two home births (both resulted in SD with broken bones).
As a matter of fact, our most severe dystocias have come with completely natural child birth and the three births that there was no dystocia and no injury were the three births that I had an epidural. (Go figure)
The most severe injury (broken humerous and Brachial Plexus Palsy) was a homebirth where the midwife did everything “right” in dealing with a shoulder dystocia.
God has been very merciful to us. Nicholas (our Erb’s Palsy/Brachial Plexus Palsy baby) has had an amazing recovery and none of our children have been left with any brain damage.
However, when we found out that God had blessed us with the child that I’m now carrying, we knew we had a difficult decision to make.
It has been a decision that I’ve struggled with for the past 8 1/2 months. Mark and I are firm believers in natural childbirth and chose to have our last two children at home because of the unusually high c-section rate of the hospitals in our new city.
If someone could tell me that our child would be born uninjured, I would choose homebirth again. My heart is homebirth and I’m grateful that the Lord allowed me to experience the joy, peace and rightness of delivering two of our children at home.
However, this baby will be born via planned c-section on July 6 (unless I go into labor sooner).
Even though I KNOW that this is the best decision, even though God has shown me through my husband (who has no doubt whatsoever) that this is His plan for me, I struggle. I really am Gideon, I want my fleece dry and then wet and even with all of that I wonder and just as God was gracious to Gideon,
(T)he LORD said to Gideon, “Get up, go down against the camp, because I am going to give it into your hands. If you are afraid to attack, go down to the camp with your servant Purah and listen to what they are saying. Afterward, you will be encouraged to attack the camp.” ~Judges 7:9-11
God is gracious to me.
For the last several weeks I have been praying that God would please confirm our decision by allowing the baby to be breech or transverse (something that we’ve never experienced before). Our babies have all been head down by 36 weeks and this was the ‘fleece’ that I set before God.
Last week at my OB appointment we found out that this baby is indeed breech. I know that we could try to flip her and I know that she may flip on her own, but for me this was God reaching down and reassuring me that we’re doing all right.
Each time I feel her tiny, little , gigantic head up under my ribs (ouch!) I’m reminded of God’s mercy and goodness to me in that even though He gave me clear direction through my husband, He was still willing to deal directly with my insecurity and fear.
I’ve never had a c-section before, so if you have any tips, suggestions or encouragement, I’m all ears.
You may be interested in reading:
Birth Story #1
Birth Story #2
Birth Story #3
You may also enjoy:
Hi, I'm Kimberly. 
When I was pregnant with my son, I wanted to badly to have a natural childbirth. However, God saw things a bit differently. Really long story short, I had to have an emergency C-section. While I was concerned for the safety and well-being of my son, I was confident in my doctor. The c-section itself was not bad, just remind yourself to relax. Also, I had heard terrifying tells of recovery from c-sections. Do not listen to these people! I was up and about almost immediately. I had very little, to no pain. I never even took the pain pills offered! I actually felt so good that I had to remind myself to take it a little easy! My son was perfectly healthy and the most handsome little boy I have ever seen!
I do understand your anxiety as this is not the way you would like for your little girl to enter the world but rest easy in God’s perfect plan and we will be praying for you!
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My last two were C-sections. Because of numerous infections I had, there was a chance of me passing them on to my daughters, causing blindness,etc. We chose to have them this way. On the first one I was terrified because she told us I would go in within 30 mintues to operating. I wasnt able to see my Pastor or family before I went in. I prayed the whole way to the room. My husband was with me. Since my first birth was natural, I had never had any medicine to totally numb. That scared me! The big sheet preventing me from seeing what was going on scared me. But seeing my husband and him praying with me I made it thru, and when my daughter was held up I was glad that we had made that decesion. She was a healthy baby girl! Healing up took longer that my first, my she was well worth it. My second C-section one year later, I knew what was going on. But the healing process was harder, because I had a one year old and a baby to take care of. You will do great and we will be praying for you. Have lots of help and God WILL be there for you!!!
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Hey! I am so sorry about your problems with births – for my first I was in (active)labor for 72 hours and ended in a c-section and have had 2 repeats since then – so I would like to share a few tips-
1. Have a raised toilet seat if you dont have tall toilets – seriously. it will make things SO much easier getting up and down .
2. Get up as soon as possible- it seems to me out of my 3 that the sooner i got up and moving (about 12 hours later) the better i felt, it was scary at first but it was so much easier as far as recovery goes – and keep getting up . the more you do (within reason of course) the better you will fill.
3. make sure you have VERY high underwear (sorry to bring this up) but the last thing needed is something rubbing against your incision-
4. Freeze as many meals as possible.Seriously. or have one of your older ones cook (We freezed bc my oldest was 27 months when my youngest was born,yes ive had 3 c sections in 3 years. the last being in March ’10)
5. I *personally* couldnt lay flat after my 3 for a good 2 or 3 weeks- so i slept in my recliner- which i got specifically for my 2nd csection – its tall and hard – furniture that sinks in is very difficult to get in and out of without jarring your incision
6. For the operating room – They had our radio station on a local christian station (I deliver at a Catholic hospitial ) and i cant tell you what a comfort it is to me to hear songs i know and listen to- that uplift the Lord- Also next time i think im going to have my husband quote some scripture to me, to help calm me( all my children have had breathing problems at birth-which is nerve wracking, and my last one was literally stuck)
whew! sorry for the long post! these are just things that have helped me – and things i have learned! If you have any questions feel free to email me- My dr. calls me his pro
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((HUGS)) You’re a brave momma and I’m so proud of you for doing what is best for your baby, even if it isn’t the path you originally would have chosen. No advice on a c-section but I’m praying for you!
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Bless you for all of the wonderful children you have brought into the world despite your complications! I can certainly understand ya’lls decision for a c-section. While I too love home birth I do know that there is a time when medical interventions are necessary, that God gave the Dr.’s that talent so that they can help. You have your child’s best interests at heart and that is usually what’s missing when decisions about interventions are made (in my opinion).
We will pray for you in this joyous (although nervous) time! God Bless!
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After almost 26hrs in labot with my first and still no progression I delivered her via c-section. After that, much to my hearts dismay, we have opted to have the rest all repeat c-sections. I will have my fifth this fall. While my heart still aches at the thought of having never experienced natural birth I am reminded to see my children as a blessing from God no matter how He has called me to birth them. Here is my advice –
Ask for an epidural type med for surgery and after. I have had three without this and at the new hospital where I now deliver this is what they use. It is day and night difference in recovery. The extended pain med helped me to be able to get up and move faster and easier thus preventing the incision from “tightning”. I felt great by about day 5. It used to take about 2 weeks.
Also, rest. Even at the hospital it is important to remember that you have just had MAJOR abdominal surgery and your body needs rest to heal quickly. Sleep when you can and keep visiting to a minimum so you can head home rested.
I will be praying for peace for you in the upcoming weeks and that your heart would be filled with joy and blessing as you follow God’s will for this delivery.
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What a decision, good for you and the baby, I’ll keep you in my prayers. I totally agrees with Stephanie. Get up, move around, and walk as much as possible. Don’t lift anything heavier than a baby for 6 weeks and eat well; lots of proteine to advance healing. I’ve had 2 c-sections (first one emergency, second one planned) then 3 vaginal births (far better, especially with small ones around) and then another c-section (breech baby again).
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Wow! I love it when the Lord gives us such specific answers. I’ve had one vaginal birth and 2 C-Sections (the first of which was an emergency – thank the Lord he was okay after a long heart de-cel). My latest was a planned C, and though I was a little nervous going in, once the spinal hits, everything is “great”! Recovery is somewhat slower than natural births, but I didn’t experience any problems. Just don’t try to do too much too soon (seriously – I felt great 2 days later, started vacuuming, and definitely felt it a few hours after!) So, take it easy and just enjoy your time with your new little one – you’ve got an excuse, now!
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All three of my children were born via c-section. My first child was born in Germany where the majority of hospitals and doctors are very much against medical intervention during the birth of a child. So to have a c-section was a big deal to my OB and the rest of the nursing staff.
Since my first son was c-section I was doomed for the rest of my births to be the same. Our hospitals and those surrounding our county are not proponents of VBAC’s. I have asked my OB if she would do a VBAC for me and she stated that although she saw no problem with me having a natural child birth senerio, she could not do it because of hospital regulations.
My last child, Samuel, was my biggest baby. Although he was born via c-section his size coupled with my petite frame ( I am 5’2″ and 115 lbs.) caused me to bleed so much that I was at blood transfusion level. I felt fine considering the amount of blood I had lost but my doctor and the surgery staff suggested a tubal ligation to prevent any future medical problems. I really struggled with this because she had previously suggested I have my tubes tied before Sam was even born. And I didn’t want to jump into a tubal and regret that decision later on in life with out serious prayer.
So as I mentioned my doctor did the tubal and I will no longer be able to have children of my own. I feel as though I will have more children in the future but they will be in the form of a foster or adoption situation. God is not through with our family yet! ☺
The residual problems I have faced as a result of having 3 c-sections are:
-loss of all feeling on the right side of my stomach and the left side of my leg below the knee cap down to the two last toes on my left foot. The loss of feeling in my foot is because of the spinal and how the anesthesiologist administered it.
-spinal headaches. I had this after the birth of my second child. It was equivalent to a migrane. I have never had that much pain before in my life and it lasted 2 weeks after the c-section. This is also due to the spinal I was given before sugery.
-a sense of loss. That is best way I can describe not being able to have anymore children of my own, not being able to have a child grow inside me, not being able to see another child that looks like me and my husband.
I hope I didn’t “talk” your “ear” off! I will keep you smothered in prayer because I know, to some degree, what you are going through and what you will face. God Bless you Kimberly. ♥
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I have not had c-sections but I have two cents! I have a sister and a sister-in-law who needed cesareans and in their place they are wonderful gifts from our Lord. I truly believe you all have made the right choice and am glad that you have options for your precious baby’s birth. Praying with you all,
Elizabeth
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How amazing that God gave you confirmation on your decision, I had goosebumps. God is so good! We will all be praying for you. The advice that I have will echo some of the others. I ended up having to have a c-section after 26 hours of labor. I would freeze as many meals as possible, stock up on all grocery items that you can. Get up and move as soon as you can after surgery. Plan to rest, have friends and family in place to help as much as possible. This was mentioned above, but some sort of supportive underwear. I don’t know if you have this problem, but I have loose skin on my stomach after the baby is born. It caused pain with the incision. Hard to explain, but some sort of bandage or underwear to keep my stomach where it should be. Sorry kind of weird. And also mentioned above, it hurt to lie completely flat and then have to sit up, so a recliner is a good thing to have. I didn’t want a c-section and was afraid, but God took the decision out of my hands and I think it was a blessing and we had a healthy baby in the end.
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Praying for you all. My sister-in-law was born with spina bifida, and as a result is unable to deliver vaginally. She now has four children, and each have been by c-section. The hardest part for her is always the recovery, but I know that they handle that by moving in with her parents for the first few weeks until she heals a little bit. I’m sure the recovery time for someone that doesn’t have a prior disability would be much shorter. But she looks at it like this. She has told me she believes that even if it killed her, it would be worth it, and that she leaves that in God’s most capable hands. She has to be put to sleep each time, so her husband couldn’t be in the room with her during hers, and so I think it’s actually been harder on my brother that way, but as long as you’re not put to sleep you can have your husband with you. God is with you, and He is able, and will be glorified in whatever the outcome, so let us rejoice in His sovereignty, wisdom, power, and love for us! “Seek the Lord and his strength; seek his presence continually!”-1 Chronicles 16:11
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While you would certainly prefer not having a c-section, it sounds like you are making a wise decision. And it is YOU making the decision (with a little help from Above!), not the doctor.
Sending prayers for an uneventful next 2 weeks!
Lucy
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Hello:) I am glad that you have had confirmation. I had Emma by c-section because I just knew something was not right when my normally really active baby just stopped moving. The doctors tried to blow me off saying everything seemed fine. I called my husband from their office and he said God told him for me to stay there, and he came right over. He demanded an ultrasound for me and sure enough, the picture showed Emma was breech, with the cord so wrapped around her neck that it was very possible she would have died during childbirth. The doctors all apologized and scheduled an immediate c-section….all the while I was praising God that he showed us the problem with the baby! I did not have time to research anything, I had planned a very natural birth with the midwife, etc. But that all changed immediately. But, I had a beautiful healthy girl soon after:) Two titems that bothered me when i compare the c-section experience with the natural births:
1. I was worried and in the unusual situation of the surgery, so I let the doctor/hospital staff control me more. During my c-section they allowed students in to watch the procedure (apparently this happened because I did not check the box to say no to this on my intake form)I had no idea it was going to happen and I was scared and embarassed and did not speak up to send them away. But, it made me angry.
2. I did not get the baby immediately on my chest nursing, like my previous children. In fact, they took her away much longer and took forever cleaning her up, etc. There was no medical reason for this, aside from them being busy with my stitches or whatever. If I could do it again, I would have demanded they give her to my husband to hold with me and let her nurse/bond before all the rest.
3. I did feel worse during the night, rolling over to pull her in with me to nurse, etc. With my natural childbirths, I do not remember feeling so bad, trying to get the baby! (This may have been specific to me and I know everyone says getting up etc quickly is good. But I did have to rest more and I thought the first night was awful. My husband stayed w/me in hospital, but he slept through some of the baby cries and someone pulled her crib away, so I had to get up and get to her. i found that hard!
Sorry this is long. But maybe a heads-up for a couple of things to demand from hospital! I’ll be praying for all of you!!
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Healthy Mom, Healthy Baby… that’s what’s most important in ALL deliveries. I’m with you, a believer in natural birth and I think c-sections are WAY overused (32% now!) BUT — there is a time and place and you are definitely doing the right thing!
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I was so glad to live in this day and age, when I have have the c-section option available in case I had trouble giving birth… they do save lives and limbs.
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Kimberly, you have all been in our prayers over this! I understand your agony. I am also very happy for you that God has given you such clear direction. It is amazing, isn’t it? Your baby girl will be born just the way God intended. When Shoshannah was born, God truly took over when I could not. Just like you, I knew we went the way He wanted (confirmed numerous times), but I STILL panicked! Why? I can’t logically give an answer. BUT, even in the seemingly small details (I mean, really, people are being tortured for their faith all over the world and I’m worried about giving birth?!?), God came in and took over for me, pushing that baby out. I am praying that he will do the same for you with this C-Section. That even when you worry and panic, He will “take over” for you and overwhelm you with His Presence!
Love you and sending lots of hugs your way!!!
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I have had 2 natural, drug free births, 1 emergency c-section and 1 VBAC. The recovery from each has been different. I will say that the c-section was not as bad as I expected!! I got up and started walking as soon as they would let me (for recovery and b/c our baby was in NICU and I wanted to be able to go see her with out having to wait on a nurse or anyone else). I will also say that I was calmest with that delivery–even though it was a 10PM emergency and 9 weeks early. God gave me a total sense of peace. For some reason they couldn’t get my spinal to take as “high” as they wanted. They offered to try again but I said no that as long as I was numb low enough not to feel the incision that I could deal with the tugging they might have to do. It was also the birth that we laugh the most about. After our daughter was born and my dh has followed her to NICU, the dr mentioned that he was ready to do my staples. I flipped out. I started crying and telling them that I didn’t have enough meds for that and really flipping out. They were asking me if I was feeling any pain (which I was not)!! They finally told me that the dr was almost finished and if I could just hold on another minute it would all be over. As I was waiting on them to finish I admitted to the nurse that all I could think of when they said “staples” was my dh staple gun and the sound that it makes!!! I just knew I didn’t have enough meds for that!!! Everybody got a good laugh out of it. Just take it easy and don’t over do it but do get up and walk when they will let you!!
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I have been thinking about you all morning and here’s what I’ve got.
Yes, natural is best, BUT for a small minority of people it is not best. Hence the reason we have modern medicine. I think modern medicine is so over used when it comes to having babies that it can get a bad rap. BUT, it is necessary for some people and it sounds like a C-section is definitely best for you!
I have never had a c-section, but I have had other complications to which I am so grateful for medicine. I enjoy having babies the natural way- but in the end the most important thing is having a healthy baby.
Best of luck- relax and your body will heal so much faster, let go of your anxiety and hand it over to the Lord.
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You have a ton of comments so I will try to make mine short. I have had 3 c-sections. They were all mostly good experiences. Recovery was super easy all 3 times. I had baby with me almost immediately after being born, to start nursing – while they were still stitching me up. You are your best advocate. I spoke up (loudly!) when it came to the baby. I wanted baby with me at all times, so that’s what the hospital did. The hospital always claimed it was “policy” to take baby out while mom got stitched up. I spoke up about watching baby to be with me and they consented. The actual nursing has to wait until I am back in my room but not the skin to skin and cuddling. Side lying nursing is a comfy position when back at home in our big ol’ bed. The only major discomfort was a shooting pain in my shoulder. I finally mentioned it and the nurse said it was common. Gas gets trapped from not passing it via the normal way so it has to go somewhere. They gave me a shot and tums and it was all better. If you have a high bed at home, get a step stool to help you in and out of it. I also had a step stool in my toddler’s room to help them get out of the crib. It is sore for a few days but about a week after the c-section, I always felt back to normal.
I honestly have felt guilty for having my children via a c-section (like it was taking the easy way out) but it worked out and they have all been born healthy.
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and sorry for not keeping it short
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I have had 2 c-sections and honestly they were a breeze. It seems to me the planned C-sections are very easy to heal from compared to the emergency ones. My recommendations are to get up and moving ASAP as they will let you and to walk, walk, walk as much as you can stand. You will heal faster and experience sooo much less painful gas. In all honesty the gas hurt me with mine waaay worse than the actual surgery..lol. get some yoga pants or some sort of snug spandex like shorts to wear under clothers for the first couple of days sfter, when you get home. You might feel as if your belly is coming out and this will help. God will take care of you and it will go smothely. I would chose a C-sec over anything else now that I have experienced 2. And I was whole heartedly against them before. Go figure. Good luck.
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Isn’t it amazing that we moms put so much pressure on ourselves. We really think we are super moms and hate to do things the “easy” way. I am so thankful that you have found out all this info on your babies’ conditions so that you can make a wise choice at this time. And isn’t it amazing that you found this all out at this time in your lives…when you have two older daughters who can manage your home while you are recuperating? God is good!! I delivered my last baby at the age of 44. I had been in a mild labor for a few days, but was having contractions about 3 minutes apart. It was my seventh baby, so my thoughts were that the time had come. We got to the hospital only to be told the baby was still way up high (the ob had said just a few days earlier that he had dropped) and I was only 1 cm dilated (had been2 earlier in the week). I was tired….they told me I could just go home. I didn’t want to, though. My other 6 children were at home including my pregnant oldest daughter and her one year old. There would be no rest for me at home and I would only see things that I needed to do and would be up doing them. The doc told me I could stay and he put me on a mild sleeping pill. I rested for TWO whole days before delivering my baby. A few hours before delivery the nurses woke me up to give me my epidural (I delivered a 10 lb 7 ounce baby before this one without the help of an epidural and was really not wanting to go through that again!). Any way, labor was really calm and easy and I recovered very quickly and was running around as usual within a few short days. So much better than what I had anticipated as an older mom. The Lord has gently led you through this decision. Rest in His grace and peace! Praying for you and your family!!
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Yes, I will pray for you! I knew something was up last week because I noticed the dates on our baby tickers were all of a sudden different! I can imagine how hard this decision has been for your family. How great that God gave you a clear answer to confirm that you made the right decision. He is amazing!
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I totally agree with all the women who said they couldn’t lay flat! I slept on the couch (was easier for me to get up from) with pillows under my knees to elevate my legs. SO MUCH BETTER!
I had a c-section with my first after 2 1/2 days of induction (medically maxed out on Pitocin, foley bulb, water broken, prostaglandins, etc.) and never dilated past 4. It is a hard decision to make and I thank you so much for sharing your struggle!
I am pregnant again (my son is 10 months) and am hoping for VBAC with this one, but prepared for another c-section. Thank you for sharing b/c this is my biggest struggle! I want so badly to experience natural childbirth and truly feel it is best, but I also recognize that God’s plan may be different than that for us. Thank you!
Also….VERY IMPORTANT! 7 days after surgery is when you are MOST LIKELY to re-open your incision. My mom is a nurse and warned me about this. You will feel much better and may do too much. I did this, though barely opened one spot on the exterior incision, but it could be worse. Just remind yourself to continue taking it easy for at least 2-3 weeks…even if you feel like you are all better.
Also, my midwife friend told me that you can request that they double-stitch your incision which makes it much stronger and can bode better for you with future births. Also make sure your doctor knows that you want a transverse incision as they are better for future births.
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I also wanted a natural birth with my child. My pregnancy was very complicated and (because of many reasons, too long to write!) due to that, we had a scheduled c-section. I struggled in the same way you do, but I am so happy I followed God’s direction. These are tips, that helped me:
-I was not too thrilled about having to take pain medications. I REALLY didn’t want to, but took them anyway. Don’t fight the pain medication the first day. Take them every 4 hours whether you think you need them or not. You will realize you need them, at the 5 or 6 hour mark! (at least, I did.) I was able to not take much pain meds after the first day, because of my next tip:
-Move as soon as you can. I started rolling to my sides and in my bed, as soon as the catheter was out. I continued to move throughout thew night. Getting up the next day was soo much easier. I felt my healing time was quicker, too.
-Don’t let your bladder get full after they take the catheter out. Trust me!!! Getting up to walk to the toilet, with a full bladder is terrible. Get up (if you can) every so often and try to potty, it helps a lot.
-Accept help! My husband had the week after birth off and the next week I took care of my son with no help. I had no shortage of help offered. I wish I would have taken my friends and family up on their offers.
My family is praying for you!!
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I have had 4 of my 5 children via C-section so here is my 2 cents worth.
1) Make sure you tell them in surgery right away if you are even the slightest bit nauseous or think you might be itchy….these are side effects to the general anesthetic they give you and the anesthesiologist can give you meds in your IV to help with these.
2) You WILL be very tired or tire easily. Don’t be tough and think you should stay awake to please whoever might be there. Don’t apologize as you go to sleep…and sleep often. Between the pain meds and the recovery process as all the layers are healing, it takes quite a bit from your body to heal. You could possibly be exhausted for weeks afterwards and that’s ok!
3) If you didn’t have a Boppy or lots of pillows to support the baby before when you nursed, you must have one now. It will keep the baby off your incision and be much more comfortable.
4) Keep a pad of paper and pencil in your hospital room. This is to keep track of what meds you are taking and when. Although the hospital staff is supposed to keep track of all that, sometimes things can happen (like the computer goes down) and they won’t know when you last had pain meds. Also, keep track of when they do assessments on you and the baby and when they want to take the baby out of the room (my dh always went with the baby, we always had the baby in our sight at all times) for testing and evaluations.
4) Make a birth plan and stick to your guns if its something you want and you can control (like DH gives the first bath, etc.). However, be flexible to things that might be out of your control (like an emergency that might send your baby to the NICU). Keep the tone in the plan friendly, flexible and cordial and most likely the hospital staff will honor your wishes as much as they can. Make sure your Dr. has a copy in your chart at the office, at the hospital and you have a couple of copies with you when you go to the hospital, just in case.
Our prayers are with you and your family as you welcome another wonderful baby to the clan!!
God’s Blessings,
tulip
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Marveling with you at the goodness and gentleness of our God.
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I agree with Amanda – children are a gift no matter how they get here.
I had a very difficult experience with my first baby, which was a pretty standard birth until my placenta did not detach afterward. I essentially had to undergo a D&C with no pain meds because I was bleeding to death. It was the most painful thing I have ever experienced in my life – more painful than the birth, which resulted in a third degree episiotomy. Because of this, and the difficulty in recovering from the episiotomy (I had pain for about a year), I was pretty freaked out about the birth of my second baby.
Frankly, I was relieved when the doctor told me that she was a 9 pound breach baby and I would need to schedule a c-section. So, here is my c-section story – it was a piece of cake. Piece of cake, Kimberly. The recovery was way easier than the vaginal birth I had the first time. I was up and feeling fantastic in no time. I had more energy (probably since I did not lose a lot of blood) and my incision healed with no problems. I had way less of an emotional roller-coaster after she was born than I did the first time (I think difficult births send your hormones into overdrive and I think it contributed to my emotional state after my first birth).
Yes, take it easy with lifting – they will tell you nothing heavier than the baby. A way to make that more real to you is this: a gallon of milk weighs 8 pounds. Do not lift anything heavier than that.
You are doing the right thing for your baby. You will be fine. All those little moments that there are to be nervous about are just that – little moments. Getting the spinal is no fun, but it’s quick. Getting the c-section is weird, but it’s quick. The baby will be in your arms probably in less than two hours from when they start prepping you. Your husband will be by your side, and your baby will have no broken bones.
You will be fine. I read that the average c-section, from the first incision to the baby being out of the mom’s body is less than a minute. I agree with being your own advocate – making sure they don’t allow extraneous people in the operating room and making sure they give you the baby as soon as possible.
You can do it!
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Good luck!
IMHO once you decide 100% on a c/s, stick with it. You would rather have a relaxed, slow paced c/s than a tense, hurried emergency c/s.
My recovery time with my second child was easier because I got up & started moving around as soon as I could feel my feet! I had better experience with a spinal block…the epidural stopped working with my first c/s & I had to be put to sleep.
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Our first was a C-section (she was transverse)
our second was a VBAC (born at 34 weeks!!!)
our third (born 3 weeks ago) emergency C-section (my placenta was detaching from my uterus)
So my advice is
* Get moving as soon as possible, this will make your recovery way faster.
* drink plenty of fluids, and cranberry juice (pure kinds not the sweet one)to prevent UTI due to the catheter that will be in place during and for the next 24 hours after the section
* take the painkillers that will be offer to you on a regular basis (for the first 3 days)this will help you to be more mobile and the more you move the better you feels
* make sure to take deep breath and caught after the section to prevent lung problem.
* Nurse as frequently as possible to help build your milk supply (your hormones after a section are not the same as via a natural birth so milk sometimes take longer to come)
* have help ready at home after section (you will not be able to lift heavy toddlers or anything heavier then 10 lbs)
* nap and rest as much as you can (this is a surgery after all)
Praying that all goes well!
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One more thing…in the event that your little one has to go to NICU or something and you can’t breastfeed right away. Make sure you have a breast pump you can start with to get your milk going. The hospital I delivered at had one in all the rooms, but I didn’t ask for a lactation consultant right away and it was kind of hard to get started. My milk came in WONDERFULLY, but I fear it would have been very different if I hadn’t started pumping.
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Precious story! God provides for our needs even before we know we have the need! Isaiah 65:24 “BEFORE they call, I will answer.” I have no advice, only prayers for you and baby.
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Kimberly, I will certainly be praying for you in the coming weeks and on July 6th. Although I have yet to have any children, I definitely would prefer the natural, home birth route, so I can understand the disappointment of not being able to deliver this way. I’m glad that God seems to have shown you that this was the right decision and I’ll pray that you have peace about this and the c-section itself.
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awww July 6th is the birthday of my sweet little foster sister. She’ll be 3 and is the biggest joy there is. She is so full of life and always happy. How fun that (if the Lord allows), your little girl will share the same birthday as a baby girl in my life that is so special to me!
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Hello! I love your post and will be praying for you and your family. I’ve only had 1 prior c section. I can tell you that when the nurse handed me an abdominal binder I was able to function better immediately. It gave me proper support and I didn’t need help to get up and down like I did before the binder. Also, the earlier that you get up and move around, the better you will be in the long run.
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No c-section exepience, just lots of love and prayers!
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Jama Reply:
June 21st, 2010 at 2:00 pm
oops, “experience”
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Kimberly,
Risk factors for a mama who’s heart is in natural birthing is excruciating. I’ve been there…more than I care to admit. I’ve had to really let go of some things I didn’t think I could let go of.
My humble opinion is that you ARE doing the right thing, and no matter how (or with what “conditions”) your baby is born, you are a good mommy even for the simple fact that is has been an agonizing decision.
Praying for you. {hugs}
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I’ll be praying for you and it seems you’ve made a wise decision to have a C-section.
One word of advice – make sure the baby gets probiotics after birth (he/she can suck a powdered one off your finger) since he/she will miss getting that beneficial bacteria in the birth canal. This is a prime factor for autism. Just a tip I would follow if I ever need a C-section.
Praying all goes well!
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Amanda was my c-section baby. She was under lots of stress with an extremely low heart rate with mild contractions. After about 12 hours of that, the doctor said it was time to intervene. Turns out the umbilical cord had a knot in it and was tight around her neck.
I experienced extreme pain after the c-section and followed the advice of the nurse and asked for pain medication as often as I could take it. Could not lay down in bed for a full week so slept in our rocker/recliner. As others have said, “Get up and move.” I don’t think that will be a problem with others claiming your attention. I also had to use pillows for nursing to protect my incision. I’ve always had some kind of complication after the birth of my children. With the c-section baby it was a UTI which I didn’t realize I had due to the pain medication camouflaging the symptoms but also didn’t realize frequent trips to the bathroom was indication of a problem (but those frequent trips helped to get me up and moving). A high fever sent me back to the doctor for antibiotics which cleared up the UTI.
I was extremely disappointed that I had to go the c-section route and that the recovery was longer, but I was thankful for that little girl and that she was doing fine.
You will do great, Kimberly, and will be thankful for this option once you hold that baby without ANY broken bones, palsey issues, etc.
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Will be praying! I’ve had 3 C-sections. I can’t say I love them, but I am grateful for the healthy babies born because of them.
Some advice for what it’s worth. I think most of it has been covered already too!
1) MOVE as soon as they let you!
Oh, and give someone in the OR (for us it was our anesthesiologist) a camera so he can take a picture of you, your hubby and the baby as soon as they bring the baby to you on the OR table. I treasure those pictures!
2) Take the pain killers as needed and offered. This is no time to be a martyr.
3) REST
4) Especially for you with many kiddos at home, have ROUND THE CLOCK SUPPORT AND HELP AT HOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
5) No heavy lifting
6) Tummy support binder works great!
7) Take it one day at a time. The pain doesn’t last forever. You will feel like your normal self before you know it.
9) Something my hubby and I also did that we loved was when they were cutting me (doesn’t take very long once they start), my hubby was right at my head, whispering a continual prayer during the entire process. It was a wonderful worship experience for us (and can’t hurt to cover the docs and staff with a little extra prayer too, eh?)!
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I’ve had four c-sections and am so grateful that I have good doctors who see no issues with me having as many as I want, as long as my uterus doesn’t become dangerously thin.
While I grieved never being able to have a “natural” birth, it is really a small thing in the grand scheme of motherhood. Some advantages for me are that I can plan ahead with a firm date in mind and I will never, ever go overdue or past 38 weeks for that matter (with a couple large babies at that point I can’t imagine how big they’d have been if I went four more weeks).
In addition the to the above advice, some things that have really made some of my c-sections better than others are:
1. Making every effort to communicate any discomfort, so that I am as comfortable as possible and can enjoy the birth process.
2. Asking to have the drape as low as possible so I can see them pulling the baby out.
3. My husband being allowed to cut the cord.
4. Knowing my baby is with my husband in the nursery bonding with him and getting his or her first bath from dad.
5. Our hospital is very pro-breastfeeding so every effort is made to get it established. As a result, the last two babies I’ve had have been brought into the recovery room for that first nursing, so they never have a bottle and get the breast ASAP. (A word of advice: be firm about NO BOTTLES if you want to breastfeed. My second baby received one because of the fears of sugar lows, etc…but because he was full it took a full 18 hours before he was interested in trying the breast and made the process difficult.)
6. The baby roomed with me and nurses (if my husband couldn’t spend the night) would come when I called and bring the baby to me to nurse. Plus they allowed co-sleeping.
7. Once home, I enter “feed mode” feed the baby, feed the family, feed the dishwasher, and feed the washer (added in that order as I get stronger over the first six weeks). That is plenty!!!! Husband can do the shopping and all else really can wait. Know (and I’m sure you know this already) you will get caught up.
I’m sure all will go well and I’m looking forward to the post-birth story!
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Oh, Dear One! I love reading your blog and you are such an inspiration to me! I have 4 precious children. I too wanted all natural child births. The first two girls were born naturally with midwives. They had SD and the med staff panicked when heart rates dropped and all. With #2, the attending Dr. shoved my daughter out with his fists on my belly (not pleasant)! Both have no problems.
Girl#3 was breech and estimated to be quite large so we were “very encouraged” to have a planned C Section. I didn’t want that, but I’m sure it was for the best since she was almost 11 pounds! I really didn’t like being separated from my baby for recovery. I wanted to nurse her right away, but I didn’t get to even hold her for over 2 hours! Honestly, the experience was as good as it could be. I actually healed more quickly than with the first 2. The worst physical part was the opiate meds for pain that made my tummy sick for a few hours.
I knew I wanted a VBAC with #4 and I elminated all sugar from my diet and exercised more and we had a 9 lb baby boy naturally and all was well – no SD this time!
You’re in my prayers. I know everything will be fine for you and baby!
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Aw man! I’m all for natural birth, and I want to avoid a c-section as much as anyone. But I think if I were in your shoes, I’d do the same thing, too.
And I love how God made this baby breech to just help you have more peace about it!
Prayers for a smooth delivery and a speedy recovery.
I don’t know if you know the gender of this baby, but one thing you could request (and make sure it is well known in the OR) is that you would like your husband to announce it.
And, if at all possible, you would like immediate skin-to-skin contact and establish the first breastfeeding before all the vitals are taken and whatnot, if it can wait.
Even though you’ll be in surgery, as long as you and baby are well, this is possible!
So talk with your doc and see if those things could be possible for you.
This is still a birth! A cesearan birth, and it’s just as blessed as the other way.
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Sleep in a recliner for a few days. : ) I think it is a good decision. We’ll be praying. How’s that for short and sweet!?
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What a difficult decision for you, but I am so happy that God has given you the peace and confirmation needed! I was wondering from a few weeks ago what you had decided was the best course of action for the delivery of this baby. And how wonderful to have had so many babies vaginally already! God bless you and your family!
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I’m just reading this and wanted to let you know that you will be in my prayers. My girls were born via emergency C-section and I’ve had two VBACs since then. I didn’t have a hard time recovering from my C-section, maybe because my focus was on my babies struggling to survive in the NICU, I don’t know, but I would be comfortable having a C-section again if it were necessary. I am thankful that God provided for you in comforting your insecurity in your decision. He is so very faithful to us!
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I think you are making the right decision for you. Especially with your birth history. Good luck. I have never had a c section so I can’t comment there but I can pray for you and your family. July 6 is a great day! (its our 12th wedding anniversary!)
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I have had 4 c-sections. First was breach when I got to the hospital, second was our choice but found out in delivery he had the cord wrapped around his neck 3 times so c-section was a good choice. Third planned c-section and 4th was twins and planned c-section. It is great if the baby can stay with you or come to you in recovery, but if that doesn’t happen don’t worry. My first was born on Jan 1st so short staffed in a smaller hospital and I had to recover in ICU. She has at least 2 hours before I got to hold her. Did touch her in OR after she was born. She also had to have a suger bottle, but she nursed fine.
Number 2 had to stay in the nursery due to temp so he was 4 hours old before I got to see him again. Nursed him once and he was then taken to NICU. Ended up being fluid on the lungs which happens with c-section babies. He was fine and discharged with me. He also had a suger bottle and no problems with nursing.
Number 3 was the first one that I got hold and nurse in recovery. I was surprised that I got her that early
Numbers 4 & 5…I could not touch them after the birth in the OR room because I could not lift me arms, felt like dead weight, and I was shaking terribly. This is an adrenoline response, but I was disappointed I could not even touch them. I recovered in my room so I got them after I got back. I also nursed them fine.
My suggestions..
1. Stock up on anything you can at home including TP, laundry soap etc and any non-pearishible food.
2. Freeze meals
3. Accept help
4. Move as much as you can without tiring or hurting.
5. I slept in my bed on my side with pillows under my tummy (it hung to the side) and between my legs. Baby in cradle next to me.
6. I used the nursery at the hospital at night the first night because my DH goes home (our choice) and I can’t get out of bed quickly enough to get baby if he starts coughing on mucus and it scares me so I feel safer having baby with nurses.
7. Rest, rest, rest. I actually got flu like symptoms when I got tired with my twins. I would run a fever, ache all over and literally felt like I had hit the brick wall and couldn’t move the rest of the night (5pm and on). I would feel fine the next day.
I also miss not having a vaginal delivery, but am so grateful c-sections are available.
God Bless and will pray for you.
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I think it is wonderful that you are continuing to do what you need to do to have more children even after the problems you’ve had. So many people quit having children because of sickness during the pregnancy or complications with the birth. I always admire anyone who has difficult times with pregancy and/or birth and still realizes that the babies are all blessings reguardless of what they had to go through for them. I know a few girls who have either had their tubes tied or at least considered it in thier early 20s because they didn’t want to have to go through another pregnancy. I greatly admire you and your husband both. I will be praying for both of you and your whole family.
I have never had a c-section so I don’t have much advice to offer. But, I have a cousin who has had 4 of them. Since we were little she has been the wimpiest person I know and she was up and moving very soon after every one of her babies without problems. So, while I’m sure it isn’t always easy I have seen it be quite easy and I hope that yours is as well.
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