Not My Child or Why I Don’t Post Regularly

“Not My Kids” – Bravely confessing some of my kid’s antics and quirks by denying them.

When Colby (4) tried to help by bringing the laptop computer to me, he did not trip and fall sending the

laptop skittering across the ground and resulting in a computer that is no longer usable.

Colby did not tie a rope to the banister and then proceed to use the wall in the stairwell for rappelling practice.

He did not move immediately from rappelling to tight rope walking by placing a broom across the gap between the couch and the coffee table.  Yes, he can walk (most of the way) across.

Colby did not use a screw driver to drive a hole into our newly patched and painted wall.

Colby and I were talking in the car about what he wanted to get Kaitlin (11) for Christmas.  “I want to get KeeKee a train set,”  he said.

“No sweetheart, you need to think of something that Kaitlin would want to have, not what you would like.”

Colby pondered this for a while and then said, “I think KeeKee wants a phone attached to a box with buttons.”

“Hmm”, I think that’s what you want.”

He did not reply in a surprised  tone, “Yes, that is what I want!”

He has not drawn on the walls of every single room in our house except the master bedroom. (He has included bathrooms, halls and stairwells.)

Colby is not just like me and does not bring an amazing amount of laughter, joy and delight to my life.

Come back tomorrow, when I share Colby’s biggest escapade yet.  We’re still laughing…

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23 Responses to Not My Child or Why I Don’t Post Regularly
  1. Anita Chamblee
    December 7, 2010 | 7:53 am

    Okay, that so makes me glad we live don’t live in a two-story house. I would be a nervous wreck! He must be very special! I have four boys, three who are older, who have not attempted some of those things….Oh, wait! Aaron, 14, just last year attempted to walk on our wood fence at the front of our property. The result? A couple of cracked ribs which were sore for months. There is no telling what they do that I don’t ever see. I just pray they don’t get hurt while crossing our creek (which is more like a canyon) and drown!
    So sorry about your computer!


  2. Jama
    December 7, 2010 | 7:53 am

    Love that kid! I have a Colby here too, only his name is Andrew. 🙂 Your mom shared a “Colby story” with me on Sunday. I’m eager to see if it’s the “big one.”


  3. Christina
    December 7, 2010 | 8:03 am

    Thanks for sharing a story that made me smile to start my day. I love hearing about your children, and although I have only found your blog a few weeks ago, I check it more times than I would like to admit in a day to see if it has been updated. All of your children are beautiful, but your little Savannah has me wrapped around her finger. I don’t even know her, but she seems so sweet and adorable I don’t know how you could ever say no to her.


    Kimberly @ Raising Olives Reply:

    Savannah is sweet and adorable and hard to say ‘no’ to. She’s also SUPER grateful for every little thing. It’s so easy to spoil her.


  4. Amber A
    December 7, 2010 | 8:24 am

    We have a Colby too, His name is Judah also 4. He is has broken his nose at 2 flying off a loft bed when jumping on it, even after we tied a board to the ladder to keep him down. He climbed fences at 18 months and just recently emptied the entire contents of the medicine cabinets into the toilet, alcohol and the bottle, nail polish remover and the bottle, crest teeth strips, etc, etc, etc, the toilet was so full things were sticking out! I am glad he is not the only one because through all his crazy times he gives us so much joy and stories to share! lol oh if I could just know HOw his mind works! I could at least keep up! HA!


  5. Renee
    December 7, 2010 | 8:46 am

    Haha Colby would love our Rebekah and but of us would have gray hair if they ever came to play together!!!! LOL

    Some little one are more daring then other right?


  6. Nicki
    December 7, 2010 | 8:47 am

    I have a Colby, except we call him Nicholas. Before he was even 2, he cracked my laptop screen. Fortunately, the computer was still good, so we just hooked up a monitor to it.

    I remember James Dobson saying in “Bringing Up Boys” that the hardest part of raising boys is keeping them alive. I’m starting to see that’s true!


  7. Stephanie
    December 7, 2010 | 9:07 am

    Loved this! Now I know I am completely not alone as none of my kids do these things either!!


  8. Lorie
    December 7, 2010 | 9:09 am

    Sounds like Colby needs to get outside more. 🙂


  9. Bunny
    December 7, 2010 | 9:51 am

    He does so remind me of my daughter, we call her Kimberly!


    Kimberly @ Raising Olives Reply:

    Thanks Mom.


  10. Jacqui
    December 7, 2010 | 10:13 am

    I am so cracking up about Colby! Sounds very familiar. My 21/2 year old is thinking of things my 2 older ones never would have dreamed of. After reading your post I’m relieved that it’s just normal antics of some kids. 🙂 His 6 month old brother is taking it all in so I may have 2 little “squidgets” on my hands a year from now.


  11. Suzanne
    December 7, 2010 | 11:39 am

    Wow!! What a fun (for us) story!! We have SEVERAL “overly creative” children. We have had to make some odd rules because of antics like these. Just a few are:

    “Don’t tie ANYTHING to ANYTHING in the house.” (this still does not stop balance beams, but does help with not tripping over rope mazes and repelling).

    “NO child uses or even touches the laptop” (After the adorable 2 year old that I was just SURE was being good pried MANY keys from the lap top keyboard…they didn’t go back on very well.)

    “No child under 6 is allowed to use crayons, markers, tools or ANYTHING that is not their own toy with out supervision” (For obvious reasons, and I’m sure you did not “allow” yours to either) At this time, however I do allow my 2 year old to play with pennies and small Legos. I am sure some would think this is odd, but since he still has a binki he rarely puts anything in his mouth.

    As I am SURE you are a WONDERFUL mom and did NOT sanction ANY of your little one’s escapades, I know with all the rules in the world, they still find opportunities to do new and creative things!!

    Everyone tells me all this extra creativity means the child will be a leader…hmm, can’t wait to see!


  12. Laura C
    December 7, 2010 | 1:45 pm

    His twin lives at my house!!!!!!! My little man has done most of the same things. He is precious! We have given up on painting walls until he is a bit older! Gotta love those boys!


  13. Beth
    December 7, 2010 | 1:55 pm

    Love this post! My laptop has no sound anymore, since my toddler (my youngest) accidently drooled into the speaker part (he had a piece of dog food in his mouth at the time- ewww!) Thanks for the laughs and reminding me that there is nothing wrong with my boys! 🙂


  14. Sarah
    December 7, 2010 | 3:06 pm

    We’ve got one like this-our greatest climber. Objects have been moved that the others never found.
    All of them have defaced walls/bannisters etc. The older children laugh at the memories now-maybe we should have a graffiti wall.
    Makes me feel better that we aren’t alone!


  15. Jessica Hilliker
    December 7, 2010 | 4:18 pm

    wow! thanks for sharing–and laughing–about your little guy’s adventures; sometimes I think my little boys are the only ones who come up with stunts & flips & adventures that shock me 🙂 You’ve encouraged me in the knowledge that that’s normal, and that I to laugh more and enjoy their “adventurous-ness” more!


  16. MomStarr
    December 7, 2010 | 9:12 pm

    I have one of those in my home…Benjamin! He is found on the dining room table dancing, playing in the oats, breaking eggs and mixing it with flour (wants to be like mommy?), taking numerous things apart, throwing valuable things in the trash, eating toothpaste etc. Man, that boy keeps me buzzing all day!!


  17. Jay quiverfull families
    December 7, 2010 | 10:27 pm

    It’s great to know we’re not the only ones with hypercreative kids that give in to temptation over and over again writing on walls it opening bottles of anything they can find and open….

    Here is our most classic memory of all on 1 minute video. Life is never boring with all of these blessings: Mikey Did It….



  18. Jennifer feedingchicks
    December 8, 2010 | 7:54 am

    That is so great! Every Colby needs a mom like you! I also have a Colby, and for years fought embarrassment about what the world would think about my ‘active’ kid. He’s a kid! We need more Colbys in the world! Do you think the founding fathers were lily-faced wallflowers? No way! Even in the ‘fable’ about George Washington, he’s cutting down a tree with an AXE when he’s a kid. I can just see everybody’s face if mine cut down a cherry tree!:)


  19. A Christmas Catastrophe | Raising Olives
    December 8, 2010 | 8:22 am

    […] some of the other things Colby did last week. Share […]

  20. Kathi
    December 8, 2010 | 2:04 pm

    Your Colby and my Wesley would be Great Best Buds!

    See here:



    …he wants “a beaver thing and eye goggles thingys and fipper feets” for Christmas (beaver=breather=snorkel … swim goggles … and flippers!)

    We laugh so much WITH HIM!


  21. Heather
    December 8, 2010 | 4:54 pm

    Thank you for sharing ! It seems like I always have one or another going through this kind of phase. My now four year old seems to (finally) be through it ( and now the one year old is picking it up). It is so easy to get discouraged when every time you turn around, it’s just something else. SO it is really nice to be reminded that these things are just silly ( and actually quite funny) childish things…they won’t last forever, and we aren’t the only Mamas struggling with them.


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