Q & A: Haircuts, Bed Wetting, Sleeping, College, Chores and Menu Plans

moms of many manageNo, it’s not Thursday, but here on RO the 4 Moms post is coming a day late because I goofed when I read the schedule and wrote on the wrong topic.

So today I’m answering some reader questions:

Monique, my real life friend, admitted feeling guilty when she asked, “How do you cut little boys hair so they don’t look foolish? (complete with picture how to’s, of course.). Since I know you’re bursting with energy and have ABSOLUTELY nothing better to do, I’ll look forward to your step by step how-to tomorrow.

Monique, Mark says,

So glad you finally asked because we’ve been wondering how to subtly approach this problem in your family.

Just because we like laughing at with you (and not at all because we’ve had several groups of out of town guests this week), you’ll have to wait until Monday for your step-by-step video tutorial of how to give a boy a basic haircut.

Inga, one of RO Facebook readers asked what we do about bed wetters who wet through pull ups during our weekly family fun nights .

Probably the easiest solution is to purchase a large waterproof pad or waterproof  sheet  protector. These also come in handy when traveling or camping.

Hannah D. wondered, “How to handle sleeping at night/get your babies/kids to sleep at night and possible all night?

We co-sleep with our newborns and this generally continues for the first few months. Until Isabella (our 10th) we didn’t have any difficulties transitioning from our bed to their own bed, but Bella had her own ideas.

Because of our commitment to breastfeeding our babies until at least a year (preferably longer), we do not push for them to sleep through the night until they are ready to wean themselves. (I know that some people have no problem continuing to breastfeed once baby is sleeping through the night, but that hasn’t worked for me.)

Once our children are old enough to sleep through the night, we do not encourage them or reward them for getting up. If little one gets up and comes to bed with mom and dad one night, that’s fine. (Sometimes it’s a bad dream, sometimes they aren’t feeling well, etc.) If it seems that it is becoming a habit, we get up and put them back in their own bed and encourage them to sleep on their own.

We don’t make it a habit of getting children drinks, snacks or giving them lots of attention during the night.

We encourage night time independence. (i.e. we teach them to get their own drinks, take themselves to the bathroom, etc.)

We always make sure that our children know to come get us if they’re feeling poorly!

Adrienne asked, “How well do you plan meals or do you choose meals day by day?

If I don’t plan our meals we’re in trouble.

I (or the children) regularly plan meals for breakfast, lunch and especially dinner. Here is our menu plan for the current week. Currently, I rely heavily on theGNOWFGLINS weekly menu plans to help with our weekly plans.

When our children were younger, I created reusable menu plans with shopping lists so that I wouldn’t have to plan every week.

We also bulk cooked for our freezer  for a couple of years. When we did this, menu planning for dinner was a snap, it simply involved pulling something out of the freezer and making sure we had side dishes.

MaryJo said, “I’ve read your posts on clothes, laundry, etc. and I’m wondering if you have the same clothing limits for babies as for older children. Do you keep more outfits on hand for little babies (extra onesies, etc.)? If you have different guidelines, could you share them?

Yes, I do keep more outfits out for little babies.

I don’t have any specific guidelines because I’ve found that they really have different needs. Bella, for example, needed lots of extra outfits because she constantly spit up copious amounts of breastmilk. Nick, on the other hand, spit up rarely. Kaitlin routinely blasted through diapers, while with Matthew it was a rare occurrence.

Many have asked about our clothing limits during potty training. I generally do not have more clothing out for potty training children simply because I need the motivation to get those urine soaked clothes washed, quickly.  When we have a child in the midst of potty training, I just throw in a couple of their things with nearly every load that I wash.

Kelli says, “my question is about budgets, paying for chores, and disciplining…how do you manage all of it on income, do the kids get paid for chores (and how do you balance who pays for what), and how do you handle the disciplining for chores not being done?

 Our children do not get paid for chores.

Here’s how we teach our children to work and how we teach our children diligence.

All chores must be done, period. If they aren’t the child continues working until they are. If a child is being rebellious or purposefully disobedient, we deal with those actions biblically. If a child is consistently not living up to what they can do, we will give them extra chores so that they can practice hard work and diligence.

Michelle wondered, “What are your thoughts about how your kids are going to do college, if they choose to want to do so. I find it overwhelming to think about(community college/state university/private Christian School, financing…) .

All of my siblings and I paid our own way through college and we all received college (or higher) degrees.

We do not personally believe that it is wise to go into debt for a college degree and it is our family’s conviction to NOT take state money, so state funded financing, scholarships, etc. are out of the question. This makes a lot of the financing questions moot.

You may want to read: Never Pay Retail for a College Education

Our oldest has 3 more years of high school and at this point has no desire to work toward a college degree. She is, however, gifted in math and science and so might pursue some higher level classes (possibly online) in those fields.

Our third oldest (now 13) has said for years that he would like to be a pastor or missionary. We continue to head in that direction with his homeschooling, but rather than automatically sending him off to college, we are extremely interested in finding a godly man who would be willing to mentor him in an apprentice type manner. We know others who have done this and have earned degrees online while being mentored by a man in the field they desire to enter.

Other than that, we are still working through these issues.


You may also be interested in:


The other 4 Moms answer your questions:


For more Moms of Many posts visit the 4 Moms page.

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8 Responses to Q & A: Haircuts, Bed Wetting, Sleeping, College, Chores and Menu Plans
  1. Vickie
    June 15, 2012 | 10:54 am

    Great questions! We think like you. We paid our own way thru college or college classes (I don’t have a degree, but have continuing ed classes under my belt) and expect the kids to do the same. I believe they’ll appreciate and put much more effort into it if they pay for it themselves. I’d rather they not get loans and be in that debt for years and years. One advantage we do have with some of the kids is they are adopted and a perk from some states is a full college ride from the state they are adopted FROM. Most of mine currently want to do online college so they can work too. An apprentice style job would be the optimal way to go. Get paid while they learn. We’ve hired the majority of our employees in this capacity and works out the best.

    Have a blessed day!


    Lisa Reply:

    Vickie, that’s awesome, I did not know about that particular perk for adopted children–thank you for sharing it! Children from large families also have an advantage as far as need-based grants/scholarships are conceded; my husband is one of 5 kids and was able to get a full-ride need based grant to community college because of the number of people in his family in relation to his parents’ income. At CC, he maintained a 4.0 and then received a full-ride academic scholarship to finish his 4-year degree, and thus has no student loan debt!


  2. Monique
    June 15, 2012 | 2:01 pm

    HI-LAR-I-OUS!! No joke, too…the boy is four and has had a bad hair cut most of his life 🙂 (Although I do seem to remember reading about a bad haircut Mark received a while ago, with pictorial evidence posted here on RO.)

    Eagerly awating Monday…

    BTW – props to answering all the other posted questions, complete with links. I hope you’re napping today!


  3. Dawn@OneFaithfulMom
    June 15, 2012 | 7:18 pm

    My oldest son is in training to be a pastor through the Acts 29 network. He is actually only 6 classes away from a college degree, but getting married and having their first child sorta made him re-assess whether he wanted to finish!
    He hopes to plant a curch within the next 4-5 years in a major city in the Southeast. Right now, he preaches every 12 weeks at their church, which he and his wife helped plant in their current city.
    We just have to break out of the way we think things have to be done, and find new ways to do them!!


  4. Dianne
    June 16, 2012 | 8:32 am

    I am so glad I subscribe to your blog! You have some really great ideas! I have a really hard time coming up with/implementing fun/bonding things to do with our family, so I’m really excited about doing a fun-night with my own family.
    And, not to step on any toes…but the topic of a pastor HAVING to have a degree really gets under my skin. While I won’t go on a rant, 1)None of the disciples had degrees (they were un-schooled, ordinary men), 2)You are not guaranteed to receive the Holy Spirit or wisdom upon graduation from seminary school. My 2 cents worth.


    Shannon Reply:

    I agree, there are several “siminary” type schools that focus on bible only classes taken online with some hands on work training thru a local church.
    I think the idea of a degree to preach is really established churches wanting their preacher to be able to handle the questions that will be thrown at them from those with a higher education.
    The current popular belief is that you can only become educated in a classroom.
    Of course that is sooo not true. Just stating popular opinion.


  5. Danielle
    June 17, 2012 | 10:01 pm

    Thank you for helping me ot stop feeling a little guilty that my still-nursing 13-month-old hasn’t slept through the night yet. My first three children did much earlier, but I was not able to continue brestfeeding due to supply issues. We haven’t pressed the Babywise-style scheduling this time, and I’ve been able to nurse beyond my one year goal for the first time! I do get concerned comments from well-meaning friends, though, who think that something’s wrong that she hasn’t slept through the night yet. I thought something must be wrong with me that I can’t produce milk when my babies don’t nurse at night. Thank you, thank you, thank you for helping me to feel normal!


    Micah Reply:

    My baby (#5) is 18 months old and is JUST sleeping through the night now. I’ve never had a problem with milk supply but the Lord gave me new perspective on nursing at night. I would tell my husband, “She won’t get up for me to nurse when she’s 18 years old!” With my first, who nursed around the clock, I let her cry it out for a week when she was months old so she would “learn” to sleep through the night. I was told it was what I was supposed to do, and I sure did want to sleep all night. I’m not sure who was more miserable, my baby or me! Now I see that I will have much more time to sleep when my littles are all bigger. My oldest, 8 years old, never gets up at night anymore. It is funny the things well-meaning people share with you. It can be hard to see that there isn’t only 1 way. I’m so thankful for the Lord continuing to teach me how to love and mother my children. It will be interesting to see how differently things go with baby #6, due in February!


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